Funeral of Karen Kates

As a child, it’s always been a pleasure to be with mommy at home or outside. It’s a pleasure to walk with her, talk with her and even disagree with her. Almost all the unforgettable stories of our early childhood are related to our moms. Though I spent very little time at home, I have a vivid memory of my mom taking care of me. My elder brother used to give her a hard time (not that I didn’t have my share) that one day she lost her cool and try to hit him, but mistakenly hit a metal and was bleeding. We were not given our lunch boxes and were sent to school. At lunch time, the office attendant came to our classes and said, your mom is here!

I am sure, you two have similar experiences with your mom and her expression of love; and I am sure we all have enjoyed our mother’s love. Absence of such a mother at our young age calls for greater attention and greater love from other significant people. Our hearts are weighed down with anger and frustration. We are filled with grief and uncertainty: my role now as a father, my role as a daughter, my role as a grandparent and uncle and aunt. This particular vacuum is hard to fill in: the absence of a mother. Other ties are at least balanced in some ways with effort. The responsibility and requirements of family members are high and you should never forget that!

What your mom taught you was not just a few expressions of love, rather perseverance in love till the last minute: her desire to see another day to be with you. Her efforts to enjoy what you could offer her and what she could offer you by just hanging on. Every loss though we could never overpower it, should be accompanied by comforting one another. Prayer is one such tool where we could experience such comfort since no comfort from others is sufficient right now.

Every death should be accompanied by a great sense of fulfillment. When Jesus died on the Cross, he said, ‘It is consummated’ or ‘It is fulfilled’. That is a great sense of accomplishment. That sense of wonder is not a result of one day effort; it is a constant effort on learning about ourselves and demanding God to be with us in all our efforts. We should never forget that the object of our fulfillment is found in God. No earthly goods could give us that greater feeling. It calls for a sound moral living. We hear often people defining one’s life on earth in a summary form: ‘he or she was a good person’; ‘he or she did all for the family’. This awakening should be heard while we are still living. I am certain that Karen died with a great sense of fulfillment!

That leaves us in a mode of uncertainly: A time of challenge that we rise above our limits of love and extend it to others in the best possible way that we know best. Every loss in society should increase our faith in God because God is the author of life. Every loss in society is a loss only for us! It is not a loss for God. We believe that Karen is with God safe and sound. Let us continue to pray that we are focused on our own fulfillment in life that is possible only through a life of commitment to God and the choices made with utmost care and concern. May the soul of Karen rest in peace!